Tonight, I am not able to sleep. It isn’t the first time either. I guess it happens to everyone, at some point of time or other. What’s keeping me awake? Worry. Yes, that’s right. Worried about the partner who I think cheated me out of my entire savings and worried about not doing anything productive all day. I have been looking for a job since some time now. And sometimes, I feel I should just take some random offer and be done with it. At least then I will probably be tired enough that I will fall asleep easily. I don’t express my feelings much usually, I don’t see a reason to. I am open about everything and usually what I think is pretty clear to everyone around me. I have a suspicion that worry is the reason for my hair turning white, and maybe not eating right. The past few days, I have been reading – and doing nothing else. It has been making me feel really guilty. Why am I reading books and whiling my time away instead of searching for a job? Isn’t that my priority right now? Will I always be this way – unfocused and random in nature? Even now, I have a ton of things I feel like doing – maybe read brit’s blog, or login to twitter or prowl facebook and see if someone interesting is online. Right now, I don’t even feel like reading a book.